Calling InThe Night

Are you there God,
Or am I just talking to thin air?
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I've been through a lot these past two months. A friend of mine completely changed into a dark, hollow shadow of his former self, forsaking his loved ones for selfish pleasures. A girl I liked a lot stepped into the darkness and can never change that part of her life back. I broke (more like destroyed) my resolution less than a week into the new year. Friends around me fall into depression and darkness. People get pregnant before ready, struggle with relationships, fear for the future. All crying out in the night for hope, change, light in this darkness. Questions like "Is this life real or is it a lie?" riddle our subconscious thoughts. Where can we go to get away from all of this pain? What happens when even families have given up? Every one just passes us by. We just long for someone to reach out and care. But we are too busy pushing them away, never wanting them to get too close, afraid to get hurt deeper. Nobody hears us calling in the night. Every phone call to friends are just us wanting to talk but never letting them know why we really called. What really is on our hearts. Why can't they see us hurting and just know, why can't we let them know? Where is hope?

I think I found hope! I found it in a friend. Her husband is being unfaithful, hurtful saying he never even loved her. Going out late at night and doing who knows what. He's moved upstairs in his house. He wants a divorce. The beauty of it all is that God is telling my friend that she needs to stay in this with her husband . God is giving her hope that He will restore this relationship. She is being torn apart, worn down, heart ripped open yet she doesn't give up. She holds on to God with all of her might. She told me that if she wasn't relying on God she would be curled up on her floor crying. I have to ask, what if the person I loved with all my heart suddenly started hating me, all of the love we shared declared never even real. Yet God would give me everything I needed to stay alive and stay strong.

God is telling us we have hope if we hang onto Him. But we have to give Him our everything. We have to be willing to let everything go and place it in His capable hands. I know it can be done. One of my dear friends is doing this and it is so amazing to see God work in her life. I see God in her smile, I see God give her comfort, I see the pain but I also see hope. Whether you are struggling with premarital pregnancy, relationship hardships, breaking up of family, pain and betrayal, feeling real, feeling loved, keeping promises, having hope; just know that God is giving us hope, always.

(credit given to the band Last Day for their song "Calling In The Night" in helping me write this)